01/A practical handbook

The manager
people
stay for.

A practical handbook for leaders, with a true story of how not to do it

By Przemysław Dymarkowski

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Paperback, January 2027.

Front cover of The Manager People Stay For by Przemysław Dymarkowski: the title in white serif type on black, a coral subtitle and a hand-drawn clock.

02/The story

Most people who quit don’t leave the company. They leave their manager.

Przemysław Dymarkowski learned this first-hand: after nearly thirty years of working for leaders who inspired him, he spent two years under a manager who humiliated people in public, dictated every word and never once said thank you.

The Manager People Stay For turns that experience into a practical handbook. Most chapters open with a short scene from those years, then show what good managers do instead: clear expectations, recognition, coaching, active listening, autonomy, psychological safety and leading through people’s strengths. Built on research, and full of tools you can use on Monday morning.

03/How it looked

How it looked.

Six scenes from the book, and what good managers do instead.

  1. How it looked

    I arrived at eight o’clock sharp, expecting to collect my entry card from reception. There was nothing there. No card. No instructions.

    What good managers do

    The first day: access, a welcome and a plan, ready before they arrive.

  2. How it looked

    The only thing ever said to me plainly was this: ‘You will not be managing here.’

    What good managers do

    Clear expectations: what, by when, and how success is measured.

  3. How it looked

    In almost two years of working for this manager, I did not once hear ‘good job’. Not even a simple ‘thank you’.

    What good managers do

    Recognise effort: specific, sincere and on time.

  4. How it looked

    The so-called one-to-ones should have been coaching sessions. Instead they felt like interrogations.

    What good managers do

    Coaching: ask more than you tell.

  5. How it looked

    ‘I know already, you don’t need to tell me.’

    What good managers do

    Two ears, one mouth: listen for most of the conversation.

  6. How it looked

    How I spoke in meetings. The exact words I was expected to use. How I was supposed to ‘manage’ a conversation. Every detail was dictated.

    What good managers do

    Autonomy: agree the outcome, let people choose the route.

04/The numbers

70%

At least this share of the variance in engagement scores across business units is accounted for by the manager.

Source: Gallup, State of the American Manager, 2015

80%

of a good one-to-one is the manager listening.

Note: The author’s rule of thumb, not a research finding.

05/Inside the book

Three parts and a toolkit.

Part one

Why people leave managers

Chapters 4
  1. What a bad manager costs
  2. How bad managers are made
  3. Moods are contagious
  4. Four kinds of safety

Part two

What good managers do

Chapters 10
  1. The first day
  2. Set clear expectations
  3. Recognise effort
  4. Coaching, the best tool you have
  5. Two ears, one mouth
  6. Give people autonomy
  7. Lead by example
  8. You never know what people carry
  9. When you see it happen
  10. When your own manager is the problem

Part three

From boss to coach

Chapters 6
  1. Let them fall
  2. Strengths instead of control
  3. Thirty-four themes
  4. My thirty-four
  5. Helping people grow their strengths
  6. Managing by strengths

Plus: the manager’s toolkit, the whole book on a few pages.

  • The first-day checklist
  • Clear expectations
  • The one-to-one
  • GROW
  • Active listening
  • Feedback: situation, behaviour, impact
  • Start, stop, keep
  • A psychological safety check
  • The strengths conversation
  • When someone is going through a hard time
  • What not to do
  • Your weekly check

06/Your questions

Every chapter in the book ends with coaching questions. Here are three to start with.

Your coaching questions

Think of the best manager you have ever had. What exactly did they do that made you want to stay?

Now think of the worst. What did they do that made you want to leave?

Which of the two would your team say you are closer to today?

That is where the book begins.

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Black and white portrait of Przemysław Dymarkowski, smiling, in a dark jumper.

07/The author

Przemysław Dymarkowski

Przemysław Dymarkowski has spent almost 30 years in IT, much of it leading global transformation programmes and large, complex implementations. He has a background in psychology and coaching.

My top five strengths

  • Empathy
  • Individualisation
  • Woo
  • Activator
  • Communication

08/Get notified

A good leader will remind you of your value, not strip it away.

For every manager, and every manager-to-be, who wants to be the one people stay for.

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